Have you found yourself wondering why is it so “hard” for me to find my person? As a Love and Relationship Success Coach I’ve noticed, often the hardest challenge for my clients is looking within themselves to really explore the energy they bring to their dating experiences.

Here’s something you may not know about our energy.  The energy we put out into the world ultimately ends up being matched by the energy frequency of others.  For instance, if we consistently discharge vibes of insecurity, desperation, hopelessness and victimization, we will end up attracting someone who needs an insecure, desperate, hopeless victim to dominate. You don’t need me to tell you that this combination is not a very pleasant match!

The patterns that cause us to live in these low vibrational states are rarely found in our conscious mind.  In other words, you are not purposely sabotaging yourself, but simply falling into old subconscious programming.  That is not to say you are doomed to remain a slave to your subconscious.  In fact, I can assure you the exact opposite is true.  For if the mind can be programmed with negative beliefs, it can certainly be reprogrammed with more positive, productive beliefs; ideas much more in alignment with the life and partner you seek.  This is where the real work comes in, for it is while we begin to develop new patterns of thinking that we become aware of the thought patterns that have been keeping us stuck in a continual loop of unwanted experiences throughout our lives.  Once identified, we can use different tools and methods to reprogram the thoughts that no longer serve us.

When working your process of reprogramming outdated pattern there are a few key phrases to keep in mind.

  1. Vibration:  A person’s emotional state, the atmosphere of a place, or the associations of an object, as communicated to and felt by others. Examples include aura, mood, feeling, tone or spirit.
  2. Core Value:  A principle or set of principles that guide your internal conduct as well as your relationship with the world.  Examples include respect for others, dignity, and leadership.
  3. Quality:  Personal qualities are the specific characteristics of a person that make them who they are. Personal qualities can be both desirable and undesirable. Examples include honesty, creativity, and friendliness.
  4. Traits:  A distinguishing characteristic or quality, especially of one’s personal nature or an inherited feature or characteristic.
  5. Desired Traits:  A characteristic or trait in a partner that you absolutely must-have in a long-term relationship; essential for your happiness and fulfillment.
  6. Deal-Breaker Trait:  A characteristic or trait in a partner that you must avoid in a long-term relationship in order to experience true joy and satisfaction.

What are Your Core Values?

This is a great place to start when working to reprogram the patterns that have kept you from achieving the results that you would love within your romantic relationships. Let’s discover your Core Values. I cannot stress the importance of knowing yourself in this area.  It is the compass by which your life is directed. It is also the compass by which you will choose the right partner for you.  Clarity around your Core Values is a big part of what creates true compatibility and a sense of ease and flow in a relationship.  The things that matter most to you in life should be compatible with the things that matter most to your partner.  Couples rarely break up because they have differences in interests or personality types.  Instead, they are much more likely to break up because they don’t share compatible values.

I would like to suggest a journaling exercise. Here’s the best way to set this up. I want you to recall some of the most meaningful, impressionistic experiences and moments of your life.

While you sit quietly and let these moments come, ask yourself the following questions:

  • How did the experience make you feel?
  • Were you with someone, or alone?
  • What was going on?

Which Core Values are you honoring? This is just one of the priority steps you can take to transform your dating and relationship experience…and fall deeply in love with yourself in the process!

Remember, you can have the life that you would love living while enjoying a juicy relationship. As a gift to you I have included a link to download Unleashed: The eBook to support you in building your perfect happily ever after. Click here to download your copy of the eBook now.

If you’re looking for a guide to support you in creating a life that you truly love, I, Donna Broadwell, CHt., CMT am here to serve. I am proud to be a Certified Hypnotherapist, Certified Life Coach, Reiki Master, Teacher, and Imagery Master. I get to live my dream of abundance and specializes in serving others to experience the same! If you would love to grow and expand into new ways of living your best life feel invited to connect with me for a complimentary strategy call.